I know, you’ve all missed me. You’ve been abstaining from horror movies because you have no one to warn you ahead of time about which ones are terrible and which ones are The Babadook.

In the past couple of months, I have moved across the country, started a new job, lived in two different apartments and have fully furnished one of them. SoI haven’t had much time for anything apart from Dumb Adult Things and drinking wine to cope with Dumb Adult Things. (I live in a normal state now with normal liquor laws and I CAN GET WINE WHEREVER I GO FUCK YES EVERYWHERE THAT IS NOT PENNSYLVANIA IS THE BEST.) (EXCEPT UTAH WHICH I HEAR ALSO SUCKS FOR BOOZE.) (PROBABLY ALSO FLORIDA, FOR FLORIDA REASONS UNRELATED TO ALCOHOL.) (ALSO MAYBE NOT WISCONSIN.) (YOU KNOW WHAT, NEVERMIND.)

But I am finally in my very own new apartment with my very own new bed and I’ve finally got some food in the fridge and I’ve finally got things like a chair and a shower curtain and I’ve finally beaten Pokemon Emerald, which means IT’S BLOGGIN TIME.

So put on your blog-reading socks and get those horror hats on, because tomorrow I am gonna write a blog post that’s not about writing a blog post and we’re gonna get this alphabet back the fuck on track. B ready. B-lieve it. B-log it. The second letter in the worst alphabet ever is coming right at your rods and cones THIS.





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